Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Milton May Refuses To Take Off His Sunglasses Until The Hulkster Regains The Title!

I created "Milton May..." for the "Almost True" show at Lulubell Toy Bodega in Tucson, Arizona, opening April 10th. It was a true labor of love, based on an actual dude I knew in middle school in the 80s, who really wore his sunglasses all the time in school for a week or two until Hulk Hogan won his title back.

Back then, anyone who did anything slightly different from the norm would be the source of immediate scorn and ridicule from a bunch nasty little middle schoolers. So it was outrageous for someone to take a stand like this, especially for something so ridiculous. But Milton defiantly lived in his own world and didn't give a rat's ass what people thought of him, so I have total respect for him doing it.

The other two kids in the picture are a composite of several of the douchey Berkshire Middle School students that I hated back then, and still hate to this day. On the left, you have the squeaky-voiced, smart-assed preppy kid; sort of a Corey Haim type (RIP); and on the right, the fat, moronic, jockish bully. To remain true to the time period, both have a freshly appied Sun-IN™ treatment to their hair.

Like Milton May, I was a bit of a geek back then also, (who am I kidding?--a big geek), who also liked pro wrestling, but since I weak-mindedly yearned for the popular kids' acceptance, I never would've dreamed of outing my geekiness the way Milton did. Just drawing the two little f#ckers behind Milton brought back my resentment. Another sure sign I need counseling.

As far as the "Almost True" part, I asked several friends about the Sunglasses incident, and everyone's memory was a little different. Some said it was definitely Hulk Hogan he was supporting, but one said that he hated Hulk Hogan and only liked the bad guys, which messes everything up. Not to mention, I researched Hulk Hogan's title reigns and had trouble finding when he lost the belt while I was in middle school, but I wasn't going to let a little factual inaccuracy stop me.

The bottom line is Milton May was a maverick, and worthy of such a tribute. So here's to you Milton May, and to all the little Hulkamaniacs everywhere!

PS: Milton May wasn't his real name, so if you know it, please don't post it here. For all I know he could be a lawyer, and with my luck, he would sue me for slander.


  1. This entry was TOTALLY worth the wait and it's TOTALLY awesome.

    I like how you say the Corey Haim (rip) type, but I don't think Corey Haim was a bully. Speaking of the 80's, I've been watching The Lost Boys so much lately.

  2. I love the idea. I hated those same types of peole, I think everyone did. Thhe picture looks great. my favorite part is the view of his note book. All though his glasses do look suspishisly like the old Bret Hart wrap arounds. -Jason Bur

  3. Thanks Chelsea and Jason! Chelsea, my Corey Haim perception is probably based off of jealousy.